Looking for activities to rebuild trust in a relationship is an excellent way to set your relationship back on the right track. A wise man once said that “It is a greater compliment to be trusted than to be loved” because no relationship can successfully float across the unsteady waters of life without the mast that is trust.
With these 20 genuine activities to rebuild trust in a relationship, you’ll be able to bounce back from painful experiences such as infidelity or poor communication. A relationship has the word ship in it for a reason because if the waves of trials come knocking against your ship or knocking down your ship, you’ll need to build it back up.
With 10 activities to help rebuild trust in a relationship and 10 Trust building exercises for couples after infidelity, you’ll be able to soar farther and freer in love with your significant other. With no further ado, dive into these fun trust exercises.
Table of Contents
- 10 Trust Building Exercises for Couples After Infidelity
- How Do You Rebuild Trust In A Relationship?
- 10 Activities To Help Rebuild Trust In A Relationship
- 11. Share Your Insecurities and Fears
- 12. Be Your Partner’s Keeper
- 13. Have Your Partner’s Back When Others Are Present
- 14. Customize A Language
- 15. Create New Firsts
- 16. Be a Shoulder To Lean On
- 17. Be Their Umbrella
- 18. Never Accept Abuse
- 19. Be A Representation Of The Trust You Seek
- 20. Never Let Romance Wither
- Final Thought
10 Trust Building Exercises for Couples After Infidelity
How Long Does it Take to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship? It takes as long as you and your partner are committed to doing right by each other.
The moment you decide to accept your wrongs, to listen to understand where your partner is coming from, to love your partner as they desire to be loved, and to do whatever it takes to make them feel secure again— that is when trust can be regained stronger than Gorilla glue on a wig.
The question of how long it takes to rebuild trust in a relationship varies by the couple. The reason is that infidelity is not the only way a partner breaks the sanctity of a relationship.
You may have noticed that your significant other has a pattern of not keeping their word or making promises they have no intention to fulfill; that they have a habit of gaslighting you, making you feel small, and making you question your reality; that they constantly withhold information and claim that doing so does not count as lying; that they never let you in and you have to hear news about them from other people; that they have little or no interest in getting to know you anymore and; that they are often absent when you need them there for you.
All these are genuine reasons to feel that your trust in a relationship has been broken. But, if you still love your partner, these issues can be rectified via these fun trust activities.
1. Communication Is The Magic Potion
This may seem like a no-brainer but as a saying by Khalil Gibran goes “Between what is said and not meant and what is meant and not said, most of love is lost”.
You may be considering brushing all that is wrong in your relationship under a carpet to maintain the illusion of a peaceful atmosphere, but the elephant in the room will only grow bigger. Swallowing your tongue will not make the pain go away, and neither will lashing out or having revenge.
As much as it feels as though you are reopening old wounds and reliving your pain, healthy communication is the most important activity on how to build trust in relationships.
Create time to do the following communication activities. Make sure that your partner does not interrupt you while you speak;
• Let your partner know how you feel about the situation or situations that have made you lose your trust in them.
• Explain why these behaviors have hurt you. (Don’t hold back, no matter how insignificant you may be persuaded to think a situation that hurts you is. Telling your partner about it can open the doors of realization and help you pinpoint when these behaviors began to hurt you and how so.)
• Express what you need your partner to do to make you trust them again. (Be it giving you space, being more present, not questioning your reality and making you feel small, or being a stronger emotional and financial support.)
After this, give them the floor to talk.
Pay attention to their body language and words. Does your partner seem remorseful? Do they take responsibility for the hurt they have caused you? Do they seem ready to do what it takes to rebuild trust?
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2. Nurture A Culture Of Constant Communication
Another important tip, when putting the work into activities to rebuild trust in a relationship, is to remember that you cannot solve all your trust issues in a day.
Take it one step at a time, making sure to give yourself breaks when you feel yourself getting angry or remorseful.
As you begin to uncover the hurt, you or your partner may want to avoid any further communication but this will do more harm than good. If you are in the wrong, running away will not make things any better. Remember, it takes two to tango.
3. Consider Couple’s Therapy
Communication, as previously discussed, is a plus. Yet, in cases of infidelity, it is best not to go into details, especially without the presence and advice of a licensed therapist. A therapist can provide a neutral analysis as to where you both are right or wrong.
Even though your partner may want to know every single detail and pressure you to spill the intricacies of your infidelity, doing so will be counterproductive and provide no comfort to your partner.
It will only make it harder to let go of, now that they can picture the event. Not to mention, while trying to explain, you may end up putting your foot in your mouth and saying something that will cause your partner to flare up. There’s no other outcome.
This is why seeing a therapist and having them mediate your sessions will not only help unroot the reason for your infidelity but also help you communicate your thoughts to your partner in a healthier and more receptive way. This brings us to the next point.
4. Forgiveness Will Set You Free
You may be looking for trust-building worksheets for couples, but I’ll stop you there to remind you what is topping the list of activities to rebuild trust in a relationship: forgiveness.
When a partner cheats on you or when you begin to feel like the person they were when you began your relationship is no longer the person they are now, you may begin to blame yourself.
If you are in the wrong and cannot forgive yourself for what you did, this blame can lead to depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and guilt syndrome.
To come above water, you need to forgive yourself and also forgive your partner. Follow these tips;
• Remember that when you forgive yourself and your partner, you do it for your benefit. Forgiveness breaks you free from the shackles of the past.
• Forgiveness gives your partner a chance to right their wrongs and learns from their mistakes.
How Do You Rebuild Trust In A Relationship?
Time indeed heals all wounds. But when you are recovering from emotional damage from your partner, it may seem like you are stuck in an endless loop of hurt and time may seem to only laugh in the face of what you are going through. These emotions are normal and you need to be patient with yourself.
Take into note all the things you communicated with your partner and never give up on love. This brings us to another activity to rebuild trust in a relationship.
5. Let Patience Pave The Way
If you are in the wrong, especially, you cannot get frustrated with your partner when they seem to be upset with you. You need to understand that your partner is hurt and they need reassurance from you.
Your partner needs to know, without any measure of reasonable doubt, that you will not break their trust again. Now is not the time to throw it in their face that you are trying to make things work or flame up at their unwillingness to show you the love you took for granted.
This is not to say that they should punish you or make you suffer for years to come. But make sure to show the three p’s;
6. Be Prepared For A Swing Of Emotions
As you work on how to rebuild trust after cheating, you must brace yourself for a range of emotions. Just as how swings go back and forth at varying speeds, you may notice the same about how you feel.
Some days you may feel like you are fine, other days you remember the betrayal. Some days you may think you have forgiven your partner or yourself, other days you put yourself down.
Remember that time heals all wounds and never shut your partner out. Always let them know how you are feeling and never shy away from seeking professional assistance.
What Are Some Trust-building Exercises For Couples?
7. Consented Access to Your Partner’s Phone
Letting your partner go through your phone is never a good idea. Feeling safe is important for building an emotional connection and then trust.
But there are conversations between friends that may be so sensitive they don’t feel comfortable enough letting your partner know about them. So to look through your phone would be to heavily invade another person’s privacy. You are also entitled to your dignity and space as a person.
To build trust again with someone who cheated on you, constantly needing to see their phones will not help with your anxiety or trust-building at all. Here are some regulations regarding calls and social media that can make your partner feel comfortable;
• If your partner who you cheated on needs you to keep your distance from the person you cheated with or someone they are not comfortable with, you would need to adhere to that.
This shows that you are listening and ready to make your partner feel safe around you once more.
• Avoid liking pictures of people that make your partner feel insecure. If your partner has some physical insecurities about their body, liking pictures of bikini models or, in the case of a man, muscular male athletes can cause the three d’s that must be avoided when trying to build a safe space: dysmorphia, depression, and distrust.
• Set your unique rules and regulations regarding cell phone usage: such as times when the phones should be put away for one-on-time and the like.
• Never go behind your partner by breaking these phone rules. Snooping shows you are untrustworthy and that you also do not trust your partner. Snooping will create a toxic cycle and that sense of security that depends heavily on phone access will sink your relationship.
8. Take Turns Planning Dates
Take turns planning date days or date nights with your significant other. The thrill of being in each other’s company, just as when you first started seeing each other needs to be revived.
Rebuilding trust in a relationship can be an exciting activity when you let your partner take the reins and plan an activity for you both. You may try something you have never done before or something memorable you used to do. This act of giving up control to your partner will let them show you the trustworthy they can be.
9. Send Your Partner On Small Errands
While your partner is out or headed out, tell them to help you get something very specific — perhaps a brand of body product or a food item that you need.
Doing so is to let your partner show you that you can trust them to be there for you in all the little ways that matter. Tell your partner to get your favorite brand of ice cream on their way from work or the gym and to give you a call or send you a text if the item is not available.
This is by no means trying to manipulate your partner or test them, but it is a way for them to earn your trust one step at a time.
10. Go on Trips Together
Whether a staycation or a vacation, taking time away from your busy schedules and the chatter of family and friends is another one of the activities to help rebuild trust in a relationship.
Rediscover one another and rebuild your friendship with some quality one-on-one time without the opinions of people around you clouding your judgment.
This experience will provide you with clarity in a relaxing environment. Save up to go somewhere with a romantic ambiance. You can check online for discounts on couple’s trips. If you have children, leave them with your parents or book a hotel with babysitters, so you can have time for each other.
10 Activities To Help Rebuild Trust In A Relationship
When your walls or your partner’s walls are up, intimacy will not be able to take root.
Talking to your partner about your insecurities and fears will not only allow your partner to comfort you and feel closer to you, but it allows you to feel safer with each other.
12. Be Your Partner’s Keeper
Following you and your partner’s conversations about your fears and insecurities, you both must understand that this information is confidential.
On no occasion should this information come to light without your partner’s permission, especially as a joke. This classifies as a breach of your trust and can undo a lot of the work you both have put in to make your relationship sail smoothly.
When looking into how to build trust in a relationship again, you must remember these tips.
Big news and other important information your partner shares with you such as pregnancy or promotion should be kept a secret until they are ready to share it, despite your views.
If you feel like you cannot hold it in anymore, confide these emotions in your partner or a journal, rather than to another family member or friend.
13. Have Your Partner’s Back When Others Are Present
Practice having your partner’s back when you are out of the house or when guests are over.
Save disagreements till you are in private, then you can air out your feelings with them. It will come across as taking someone else’s side when there is a disagreement or someone seems to be putting your partner down, claiming to be joking, and, instead of standing up for your partner, you join in or keep quiet.
It is not being fake because standing up for your partner will make them feel safe and loved. These emotions will go a long way towards rebuilding trust in a relationship, and as an added incentive, will also make your partner more receptive to your bone of contention.
What Are Some Trust Exercises?
14. Customize A Language
When you begin to communicate healthily with your partner, you both would come to understand that there are some words you and your partner utter or behaviors you and your partner exhibit that may trigger either of you.
Agreeing upon a phrase or a gesture that will let your partner know when you are being serious or when you are feeling offended will go miles towards rebuilding trust in a relationship.
15. Create New Firsts
Another one of the activities to rebuild trust in a relationship is to create new and better memories with your partner by trying new things for the first time.
The key is to keep an open mind; Is there something you or your partner have ever wanted to try? Like attending a chocolate-making class, a music concert, a play, or even going bungee jumping?
Do not knock down your partner’s ideas but let the floor be open for opinions and you just might find a new bonding activity.
Lastly, remember that you do not have to be the winning couple or the most put together, the goal is to have a lot of fun and build intimacy and trust.
16. Be a Shoulder To Lean On
When your partner is going through a tough time, you may think the solution is right in front of their face. But what you may see as simple is a lot more difficult in their shoes.
Rather than trying to be a teacher or a parent who pushes them towards change, know that it is a process and processes take time.
17. Be Their Umbrella
When the rain comes pouring down, umbrellas are like a security blanket; something that makes the tough times less daunting.
Be a support system that reminds your partner, they are not alone. Couples’ therapy or one-on-one therapy is also a great place to carry on the healing process.
18. Never Accept Abuse
As much as you may want to be there for a person who is going through tough times, you must draw the line when it comes to sacrificing your happiness. Emotional and physical abuse should never be tolerated.
If your partner is constantly checking or tapping your phone, berating you, accusing you of cheating, and preventing you from having any friends of the opposite sex, this is toxic behavior.
If your partner prevents you from going outside, refuses to provide for you financially, or worse, lays his or her hands on you, you need to find your way out of that relationship.
Never be so focused on what another person seems to be going through that you jeopardize or sacrifice your peace of mind, joy, and safety. You are not their emotional punching bag or doormat but a person who they should respect and regard as their equal.
19. Be A Representation Of The Trust You Seek
You cannot be looking for trust in your partner while they do not feel safe with or around you. Just as respect is reciprocal, so is trust.
When you say you will do something, keep to your word. Forgetting to buy them something you promised to or to call at an agreed-upon time, may seem minuscule to you but is a huge deal to time. Including patience, trustworthiness, and reliability towards your partner usually, nudge them towards trusting you and reciprocating your emotions.
20. Never Let Romance Wither
Simple gestures like getting flowers and chocolates, a new tie for your partner, or something they mentioned in passing will go a long way towards making them feel treasured.
If your partner has been complaining that you do not make time for them, ask them out on a date when you have a free schedule. Wooing your partner does not end when you are now in a relationship with them, rather it should be a constantly renewed commitment.
This brings us to the end of our 20 genuine activities to rebuild trust in a relationship. Share this article on your social media platforms with others who will, no doubt, benefit from these healthy tips. I wish you good luck. May your ship of trust sail swimmingly across all waters.